Back

Damn Am I Bad At Programming?

7/24/2023

3 min

The other day I was browsing around Reddit, laughing my ass off at the shithousery going on with the whole NextJS app router fiasco, when I came across a post from r/csMajors titled ā€œWhy is everyone godlike in comparison to me?ā€ Now I usually tend to ignore any posts from r/csMajors because a majority of the time itā€™s some pessimistic bum complaining or some elitist flexing their 4 quant offers. However, this post made me pause for a moment, and in that brief moment of thoughtlessness, swayed by my unnerving curiosity, I opened the post and started reading.

The author had a lot to share in the post, but it wasnā€™t the words that moved me. It was the desperation and angst in their tone. I could almost envision the author, tearing up from frustration and on the verge of doing something irreversible.


In the field of computer science, itā€™s not uncommon for people to struggle with Imposter Syndrome, yet what resonated with me in the authorā€™s post wasnā€™t a lack of self-belief. In fact Iā€™ve always been pretty confident in my abilities to learn and produce. The feeling that plagued me was the fear of being left behind. At every point in my programming ventures, as I approached what felt like the summit of a mountain, there always appeared to be another peak looming ahead.

I was overwhelmed. Not just by the endless array of technologies to master but also by the remarkable developers I encountered and the incredible projects they spawned. This sensation, however, perplexed me. Iā€™m currently approaching my sophomore year in college (at the time of writing this article). If anything, I should be feeling more liberated than ever given that I have a couple more years of freedom before entering industry.

Perhaps itā€™s because the software industry has evolved substantially, perhaps itā€™s because Iā€™m surrounded by amazingly talented individuals, perhaps itā€™s because Iā€™m graduating early. Regardless of the reason, I felt the need to simply do more and to my surprise, with every additional effort, I only felt more like a massive idiot.


An intriguing observation Iā€™ve made during my journey in development is the proliferation of modern tools that significantly streamline the development process. Although these tools facilitate entry into the field, they also diminish the depth of comprehension for many individuals. Essentially, increased abstraction results in a scenario where more people lack a genuine understanding of the underlying processes. As a result, those individuals may struggle to solve more complex issues due to their limited grasp of the technologyā€™s inner workings.

In other words, software engineering is tough and that 6 month bootcamp you plan on doing definitely isnā€™t going to be enough. Social media seems to have romanticized software engineering jobs as a high-paying occupataion that can be achieved with minimal effort. However, you donā€™t become a great software developer in 2 months by taking a couple of Coursera courses or watching 4 hour YouTube videos. Thereā€™s a lot more that goes into becoming a great software engineer. Countless hours go into studying, practicing, building, and failing.

Once again, Iā€™d like to reiterate that Iā€™m not harping on people who enroll in courses or watch tutorial videos; in fact, I believe those are excellent resources for learning about specific technologies. Rather, my concern lies with those who underestimate the difficulty of the software engineering.


So to answer my original question: am I bad at programming? No, but it sure does feel like it sometimes. I realize that this article has been all over the place as itā€™s basically a giant rant about my personal thoughts. However, I would hate for it to end on a shitty note. Instead, Iā€™d like to say that being overwhelmed is natural, but amidst the the daily struggles, itā€™s crucial to occasionally reflect and recognize how much youā€™ve evolved. Donā€™t give up; you got this!



Thanks for reading. Cya šŸ‘‹.